Thursday, March 29, 2007

Portnoy's non-complaint

These days our intergalactic friends are a lot closer than we think. Trouble began two months ago when a scheduled space shuttle landing was cancelled due to a UFO sighting, near the Shuttle’s base. Following proper protocol from Chapter 9 article 1.7 paragraph three in NASA’s standard of conduct manual on the day of landing (SOCODOL) the mission was delayed.
“If by chance an unidentified flying object (UFO) is acknowledged within 500 miles of shuttle on day of landing and if the US air force is unable to handle the situation by force, the preceding landing shall be postponed until the situation is investigated and the skies are clear of any activities that would other wise lead to any kind of danger towards a successful mission.”
The SOCODOL goes on further to suggest proper ways in misleading the press into the actual occurrences of UFOs near the Kennedy space center.
“Sleet, snow, rain, hurricanes, and attempted kidnappings by past astronauts are all acceptable headlines worthy of necessary diversions.”
“I have never seen anything so close to one of our bases since the great battle of 1992,” said NASA engineer Mary Portnoy.
When asked about the great battle of 1992, Mrs. Portnoy gave a response straight out of the SOCODOL manual, “Have you heard about the kidnapping attempt last month?”

Something is up. My connections with the Alien Black Market (ABM) tell me that the great hexagon at the center of Saturn's northern pole is not a sign of things to come but of things that have past...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

If it's from Fox it's true -