Crappy essay I wrote for a textbook at Yonsei

So crappy, I kind of like it. See if you can guess the topic. Use it for your classes:

Imagine immaculate, blue sky from horizon to horizon. Gleaming sky scrapers, smiling kids with boxes of caramel corn, stadiums, firey Tex-Mex, the majesty of the Rocky Mountains. And you’ll have plenty of room to move and mull and take it all in. What I’m describing is the modern, rustic, and cultural melting pot that is the New America. Welcome to Denver, the perfect home for the next World’s Fair.

A World’s Fair needs adequate infrastructure; in this area Denver delivers the goods. It has a huge convention center and a dizzying array of accommodations from the budget to luxurious. It has several state-of-the-art stadiums and a light-rail network that is the envy of the west. The clincher? The area known as Stapledon: This was the area of the former airport and is ripe for development; The hallowed name of Stapledon should live on through a New World’s Fair.

Denver is festooned with a populace of tremendous diversity. Denver has long been the home of an industrious Latino population that is redefining the New America. Enclaves of other ethnic populations such as Korean, Vietnamese and Russian also give the town an uncommon flavor. Denver embraces the new as it does the old: The old west pioneering spirit still remains. Visit the numerous museums dedicated to the old gold rushes. Denver or bust!

Perhaps the most compelling reason for holding a world’s fair in Denver is its astounding environs. The Rocky Mountains have been holding visitors in awe since the dawn of Native populations; new visitors to the world’s fair can find themselves enthralled in the majesty and beauty of this vast and dramatic mountain range. If hills aren’t your thing, the metropolitan area explodes out into the austere plains of the east. It should be said that though the Denver weather gods can be a tad fickle, the weather is generally quite good. It gets hot in the summer, but not overly so—with not too much rain. In winter, if there’s a snowstorm, chances are the sun will come out to melt it within a day or two.

I invite your committee to come to Denver and really experience the pleasures of this former pioneer town. Come taste the sundry delights of our ethnic cuisines; experience for yourself how livable and convenient the city is to visitors; and, finally, bear witness to the splendor of its dramatic terrain. One shouldn’t ask if Denver is ready for the world, rather is the world ready for Denver!

The deadly truth of Awareness Weeks

October 22nd marks the beginning of Islamofascism Awareness Week. Here's John McCain on the issue.

According to Front Page Magazine, in a nutshell, here's what Islamo-fascist Awareness week is all about:

The purpose of Islamo-Fascism Awareness Week is as simple as it is critical: to confront the two Big Lies of the political left: that George Bush created the "war on terror" and that global warming is a greater danger to Americans than global jihad and Islamic supremacism.

We here at Angry and Sloppy find it quite interesting that this awareness week coincides on the week AFTER Clock-brain awareness week--just two weeks before Halloween! Also note that like Clockbrain, Islamo-fascism is ambiguous in its hyphenation/compound word/or two separate words state of existence. If that's the nature of language, or the nature of new deadly threats--i'm not sure. Simple and critical, sure. But what's more simple and critical: the threat of a religiousio-totalitarianistic ideal (namely Islamo-Fascism), or a tenacious and wide-spread affliction (namely, Clock-brain)--and, more simply and critically, which is more imminently threatening, Global Warming or Jihadism, or Global Warming or Mass-Global Clock-braining? It's a conundrum of a pickle--and it deserves awareness weeks, no doubt. Both come at the same time Global Warming is cancering the newpapers after New Order Priest Gore won the Noble Peace Prize. Awareness is at an all time premium! And Salman Rushdie's ex-wife ain't helping us!

(Super sexy Rushdie-ex image taken from here.)


But, and this is my point, Clockbrain advocacy is at an all time low. There is no funding for it. So, if you are reading this, remind your friends: Yes, the terrorists want to kill us, but their killing us will do no good if we've got clocks in our brains.